What is Attachment Theory?

Attachment theory is one of the most influential ideas in psychology, offering deep insight into how our earliest relationships shape who we become. Developed by British psychiatrist John Bowlby in the 1950s, the theory proposes that human beings are biologically programmed to seek closeness and security from caregivers—especially in times of stress or danger. This attachment system ensures survival in infancy but also lays the foundation for emotional and social development across a lifetime.

According to Bowlby, when a caregiver consistently responds to an infant’s needs with warmth, comfort and reliability, the child develops secure attachment—a sense that the world is safe and that others can be trusted. This ‘secure base’ encourages exploration, learning, and emotional regulation. However, when caregiving is inconsistent, neglectful, or frightening, children may develop insecure attachment styles, which influence how they relate to others as they grow.

Psychologist Mary Ainsworth expanded on Bowlby’s work through her ‘Strange Situation’ experiments, identifying three primary attachment styles: secure, avoidant, and ambivalent (or anxious). Later research added a fourth, disorganised attachment, often associated with fear or trauma. Each style represents a distinct pattern of how people manage closeness, trust, and emotional needs in relationships.

Attachment theory doesn’t stop in childhood. Our early experiences shape the “blueprint” we carry into adult relationships—how we love, cope with conflict and handle vulnerability. The good news is that attachment patterns aren’t fixed; with self-awareness, therapy, and supportive relationships, people can develop greater security and emotional resilience.

In essence, attachment theory highlights our universal need for connection. Whether in parenting, friendships, or romantic relationships, the quality of our early bonds echoes throughout our lives, influencing how we trust, love, and heal. Understanding these patterns can help us build stronger, more compassionate relationships with others—and with ourselves.